In sickness and In Health..My husband

My husband and I were five years into our marriage when I was initially diagnosed with the wrong diagnosis but it wasn’t completely wrong, it was close. I was initially diagnosed with psoriatic arthritis presenting without psoriasis. We were having a very cold winter here in Georgia with a few ice storms and I was 28 years old. I woke with excruciating pain in my heel, ankle and wrist one morning along with warmth and redness. My husband being concerned drove me to the doctor who at the time tested me for rheumatoid factor and gave me a referral to a rheumatologist in our area. The wait time was very very long- about six to eight months. I made the mistake of calling a different rheumatologist who would see me right away and they gave me the improper diagnosis of PsA. The rheumatoid factor did come back negative. My husband has seen me cry and fight through the pain, the emotion of not knowing what was going on, and has always been there to hold me through it all. Even when he doesn’t understand which is almost all the time, he is there for me. I may feel that he should understand but that isn’t fair to him. He doesn’t have this disease. He doesn’t have what I was later diagnosed with as ankylosing spondylitis by a better rheumatologist. How can I expect him to possibly understand a disease that he has never experienced in his life? Or to expect him to understand pain he has never experienced? I can’t. Sure I can give him an analogy of what it might feel like to have AS but that still wouldn’t allow him to fully get it. You know what though? I don’t want him to know what it’s like either. We have had our ups and downs in our marriage because I am ill but it has made us stronger as a couple. Sure I wish I wasn’t sick but at the same time it would make us completely different people, possibly less compassionate, less empathetic or less sympathetic people. I LOVE who I am. I LOVE who he is. I LOVE us. We are a beautiful couple and that’s what matters to me. My husband is my world, he supports me through sickness and as little health as I get too. I do the same for him.


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