I hear the rain outside as it pours down from the heavens. How fitting it is to how I feel everyday. Thunder booming behind it signifying my anger. Why this had to happen in my life, I don’t know but I’m trying to roll with the punches. At times I want to die and others I want to mutilate every portion of my body to ease the emotional pain I feel. I miss my husband so much but I know he will get us to him. That I have faith in. He is amazing and cares so much for us. My new family is amazing as well. I keep reminding myself that it won’t always be this way. Soon I can start that countdown.